Invader

I read an article on-line a few weeks ago that women's bathroom products are 30% higher on cost than men's. It was a part of a super-saver series. If women bought non gender related products, they could save a pretty penny.

In the aisles of Wal-Mart Sunday, I took the test. The pretty pink fruit scented shaving gel with extra aloe I had been buying for years cost $2.79. I skimmed the bottom shelf and found Colgate shaving cream with extra aloe for $.99. Holy crap! That's a lot more than a 30% increase!

Next item: razors. The disposable pink daisies came 10 in a bag for $2.99. Man-blue disposable razors? 25 for $1.99. Oh dear God, I couldn't believe how much money I have been spending over the years so I could have pink things! With the exception of deodorant and conditioner, I bought all non gender bathroom products: shaving cream, razors, soap, and mousse. I saved a ton that I promptly spent in the bargain bins at Barnes & Noble.

Yesterday I returned home from work and I stopped in the entryway with my keys in the door. My apartment felt wrong. It felt like there was someone there while I was gone. Moreover, it felt like a man was there while I was gone. I stood on the slate tile and inhaled. Yes, a man had been here.

I dropped my keys in the basket and turned around and faced my bathroom door, following the scent. It smelled of all things man: Irish Spring soap and shaving cream. I felt a pang in my heart, remembering all the times I returned home to that smell. If I walked around the corner I would see the man napping with my dog.

I didn't have to walk around the corner; I knew no one would be there. I stared motionless at my bathroom door. I had done it to myself. I didn't buy the girlie products and now it smelled like a man. I didn't even know I had missed the scent until it came wafting out at me, but there I stood spellbound.

Nikita came out from under the bed, stretched and yawned and wagged her way over to me. I crouched low to pet her, still staring at the bathroom, almost willing someone to walk out of it. I felt lonely. For the first time in a very long time, I felt lonely. I inhaled one last time, feeling another pang.

Nikita licked my wrist and brought me back to present times: a happy dog, a beautiful apartment with everything I could want or need for, and a busy schedule that didn't allow me to pause and think about such things. The phone would ring in a minute and I would spend the hour before dinner gabbing to my best friends about upcoming plans, laughing while the grilled chicken consumed the sharp smell of Irish Spring.