Thursday, November 02, 2006

Whoosh!

Whoosh!

"Did you hear that?"

"Hear what?"

"That whooshing noise."

"No."

Whoosh!

I heard it again, I knew I wasn't going crazy. "Is that your brakes? Sometimes anti-lock brakes make an air noise when you press them."

He hits the brakes. No noise.

Whoosh!

"Argh! What is that!?"

"Maybe it's the convertible top?"

"No, the noise isn't coming from there."

I had forgotten about the noise during dinner. Afterwards we walk back to his car. He leans in to open the door for me and--

Whoosh!

Oh. My. God. It's him breathing.

Not only am I going to the Christmas party alone, but also I am going to die alone.

Because that is what happens when you end things with someone over the way he breathes.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

haha - you didn't tell me about that!! i can't stand when you can hear someone breathe - its one of my biggest pet peaves. sorry i was so out of it on the phone last night - i was in the middle of a pity party for myself :o)

Momo said...

Ewwwww!!!

A mouth breather?!?!?!?

Jamie said...

Mel- The breathing was just the icing on a very bad cake.

Momo- That's the thing! It was through his nose -- I guess I should have given him points for not being a mouth breather. I almost asked him if he had an adenoid problem, but decided against it.

dont eat the token said...

Ag! I am on your side. Can you imagine the SNORING?

citizen student said...

alright seinfeld, elaine and george all rolled into one wonderful jamie...

take a step back and evaluate the mouth breathing thing...

cuz there are so many things about br that make me sit back and stare at him wondering how i could kill him and not get caught. but i'm still with him :D

 

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