Rifle in hand and two in the bush

Like relationships, I think people can become gun-shy regarding their jobs. I don't really know anyone who is comfortable in his or her job. Everyone has the lazy eye, keeping watch for new opportunities while at the same time trying not to get canned from their current positions.

I've become gun-shy. When I first started interviewing for my current position, I refused to get excited about it or even tell anyone. When they offered me the position, I smiled and thanked them, but I still lacked excitement. I should have been jumping up and down that my 4 month unemployment spell was over and I would be making good money again. Unfortunately, I've been canned before and jobs for me became my figurative boyfriend--I didn't trust them and was fully expecting them to screw me over.

My coworkers began questioning why I haven't decorated my cubicle. I told them I had a few things, but they were still in boxes from my last move. Truth is, if they let me go, I just wanted to grab my keys and leave, I didn't want to go through the shame of having to collect up my pictures and paintings. You feel like a big enough loser as it is without having to hang around to take things with you. You take down artwork and immediately loathe it for making you stay behind while everyone watches and whispers.

Before I signed my lease, I went to my boss: "I'm about to sign a year lease on an apartment I love, but can barely afford. Before I enter in any contracts binding me to this place, is there anything I should know?" That's how skittish I am.

She had a good laugh and told me to take the apartment.

I love my job. For the first time I have an actual career that can take me places. I have a job that requires a college education. It requires me to think. I'm a specification writer: I write legal binding documents for architects and engineers. So after 4 months, I finally hung something up in my barren cubicle and my coworkers can't stop laughing: